Monday, September 7, 2009

HANDLE YOUR FRUSTRATIONS AND MOVE ON


"I feel so frustrated!" As a human being, chances are you've said this many times, either out loud or in your mind. The great thing about accepting you're frustrated is that you've identified and acknowledged what's going on. It's too easy to carry on struggling with something and being unaware that it's causing you frustration. Once you've realized that you're frustrated, you're free to make choices about how you handle it. The way you handle your frustrations is a key to successfully moving on.

One of the first choices you need to make is to shift away from being a victim and from saying "Why me?" or "Why did this have to happen?" Being a victim wastes your time and energy and often leaves you feeling even more frustrated. Instead, make the shift to tapping into your own resourcefulness and discover solutions. Part of the reason we often stay stuck and frustrated is that we don't believe we can do something about it. You are more resourceful than you think.

The first step is to identify specifically what you're feeling frustrated about. It may seem obvious but often when we feel frustration, we start to pile other unrelated things on top of it and this clouds the issue. Specifically naming your frustration is half the battle.

Once you've identified this specifically, then be an observer of yourself. This isn't an opportunity to beat yourself up. It's an opportunity to observe what's going on without judgment, leaving you able to make effective choices. As an observer, you'll often see a different perspective. As you're observing yourself, see what you most need, what's truly important to you and what it will take to move forward quickly. Observe the chatter that's going on in your mind. Is your mind chatter keeping you stuck? What is worth listening to?


One of the best ways to be an observer and to see the situation more clearly is to take a break. Once you've stepped back from the frustration, you'll find it easier to tap into your creativeness and come up with ideas and solutions. Tap into the creative and resourceful part of yourself by asking empowering questions. Empowering questions such as "What is important to me about this?", "What is the intended result?", "What choices are available to me?", or "What is the next action I need to take?" When you're asking these questions, listen carefully for your own response. This is where your own personal resourcefulness will show up and give you the answers and solutions to enable you to move forward. You'll quickly move beyond the frustration and get back to achieving what you want.

When frustrations have occurred, it's well worth getting to the source so that you can handle it once and for all. What often leaves us frustrated is when the same problems come up time and time again. Get to the source of your frustration and from that, learn what needs to change or needs to be done differently in the future. Frustrations can also present an opportunity, although it may not feel like it at the time. They're an opportunity for growth and improvement. Next time you feel frustrated, I invite you to see it as an opportunity.